“Oh yeah… Whore!”

I love Iran. They were about to stone some chick they say committed adultery, whatever; a bunch a people from around the world got pissed about it, so now they’ll probably just hang her – those softies. Well, French First Lady Carla Bruni came out (he-he) in support of this woman and in response to that Iran comes back with, “Whore.” From this story:

Iran’s hardline media have called French first lady Carla Bruni a “prostitute” after she expressed strong support for an Iranian woman facing death by stoning for adultery.

It’s fun watching these countries come into their own; like little kids trying to figure out how to deal with people who disagree with them. Iran seems to be in the name calling stage. They might as well have called her a ‘doo-doo head.’

I take personal offense to this – because like every other straight guy in the world, I would love to have sex with her – and so my response to Iran is, “What’s it like to have such a small dick?” Yeah. Face. Moded. High-five.

So I guess Carla Bruni was in London with her president of France husband who’s really only worth talking about because he married a hot French model – and while there she hung out with the English prime minister’s wife. Look it doesn’t matter, she looks fucking unbelievable. And she’s getting up there age-wise. For more pictures go to OK.

The story says the two broads became BFFs. Which reminded me about my BFF, and I thought long and hard about my BFF, and then I realized I don’t know what the hell a BFF is; in porn terms it would mean Bear-Female-Female. That sounds dangerous. I’d have to watch it through cracks between my fingers.

The one on the left – your left – is Sarah Brown. I guess she’s the wife of former British Prime Minister Gordon Brown (on your right). So, that must mean that she has something to write a book about. She’s going to call it Behind the Black Dooror something, which probably means something if you know anything about the British Prime Ministership. I can only assume there’s a black door somewhere where they live or where the Prime Minister does his Ministering. From this story:

The publisher said Monday the book would tell readers what it’s like “to shop with Special Branch (detectives)” and “cope with a bad hair day when Carla Bruni’s in town.”

Who the hell is going to read this?

Dear Diary, Carla’s in town. She’s so pretty. I wish I had hair like hers. Why couldn’t she be here yesterday when my hair looked good. Hers always looks good. I wonder what shampoos she uses…

I’d rather scratch my nose of with a toothpick than read this garbage. Maybe if she couldn’t resist the womanly wiles of Carla Bruni and they made love to each other in the Big Ben clock place, wherever, doesn’t matter. And it’s not that that would even be something I’d personally like to read about - she’s old - I just think it would make for a better book, almost readable.

As far as I know, models are perfect… in every possible way. Although my ‘perfect’ might be different from a politician’s ‘perfect’ when it comes to wives. Take Nicolas Sarkozy, the president of France, who married model Carla Bruni. She looks fantastic standing next to him – even though she makes him look like a hobbit as she towers over him, but like any guy banging a model he can tell anyone who makes fun of him for being shorter then his lady to go fuck themselves ‘I’m bangin’ a model, dude.’

But going back to my perfect versus a president’s perfect… My perfect = a sexed up, sex crazed, sex maniac who only thinks of one thing… Sex. This may cause a bit of a headache with a public official. From this story:

According to a forthcoming book obtained by ABC News, French first lady Carla Bruni-Sarkozy once told U.S. counterpart Michelle Obama a story that lends a whole new meaning to the term ‘international relations.’

Bruni-Sarkozy said she and French President Nicolas Sarkozy once kept an unnamed head of state waiting while they had sex, the book says.

The book is by Jonathan Alter called ‘Obama Year One’ or something like that – people might actually read it if it’s full of First Ladies talking dirty to each other.

There’s also some old video of a young Carla Bruni on some fun TV show saying sex phrases in different languages from that book pictured above (which you can get on Amazon for like $300! What the fuck)- pretending to take it out of her purse and read naughty phrases like how to tell someone you want them to stick their finger in your butt. Which by-the-by should be fairly easy to ask for without using any language. You can see it on Gawker.com still, but it has been taken off YouTube for copyrights/France’s government doesn’t want people watching it’s First Lady saying stuff like that. I work in radio and can only imagine the greatness that would be audio of Michelle Obama saying things like that…

But, when you think about it, a young model goes on a a ‘fun’ type TV show and says some shockingly naughty things. I don’t think we would look twice if we saw that happen here on TV.

Oh, yeah, and since I can’t embed the TV show because I don’t possess the voodoo magic that Gawker has… here’s Carla Bruni’s music video.

The hot-ass wife of the President of France, I forget his name… SharkCozy or something, who cares, that’s his wife. Did I already say that, sorry, can’t write well when that picture is right in front of me. Anyway, she actually thinks that she loves some guy who happens to be the President of France (as opposed to loving the President of France who happens to be some guy). From this story:

Ms Bruni, 42, also said that she despised media which this month published unsubstantiated rumours about the state of her marriage with the French President.

The singer-supermodel said that the “media-political world” was brutal towards Mr Sarkozy, 55. “The balance, happiness and health of my man are serious subjects. I am going through this moment of life with a lot of worry.

First, SINGER-supermodel, who the hell knew she was a singer? Maybe it’s because she could be an amazing singer and she’d still be 10-times hotter than she is talented. No one would notice.

So, what happened was that it was rumored that the President of France was banging some hot chick, and that this Carla Bruni was getting banged by some dude. I think Ms. Bruni realizes that there is no way she can sleep around on her husband with all this media following them around. So, that’s smart. Because otherwise, what other Dream-Killer chicked-out bull-shit is this bitch trying to pull.

It was reported by me that she said, “Baby, I don’t think you should be the ruler of a whole country anymore… if you love me, you won’t do it anymore.” Personally, I don’ t think my sources are 100% accurate. But you can imagine that’s probably what she said.

Now as a guy I think I know what he must be realizing, that she’s about as good as he can get… but I don’t think that’s true SharkCozy! In your head, she’s as hot as she was when you first got together (like that picture above); but that’s not what she looks like anymore. You can do better than that. Ditch her, be the President France and get some hot-mother-fuckin’ French ass!

This is what she looks like now.

Still not bad, but if she thinks she’s going to get him to leave office for that…