First, let’s remember that Obama opposed California’s ban on same sex marriage, but doesn’t think gay people should be able to get married. Uh… whatever.

California has ruled that the Proposition that never should have been voted on is unconstitutional because the people who supported it did so because they hate homosexuals.  From this story:

In a blistering repudiation of California’s ban on same-sex marriage, a federal judge ruled Wednesday that the right to wed one’s chosen partner applies equally to all Californians and that the case for excluding gays and lesbians was based ultimately, and unconstitutionally, on “moral disapproval.”

I hate this argument; I don’t give a crap about who gets married to who; but this doesn’t make any sense: a ban on same-sex marriage is unconstitutional because it excludes gays and lesbians. But a gay guy could marry a lesbian, but two straight guys couldn’t get married. So, this ban didn’t really exclude gays and lesbians, it excluded anyone, everyone who would want to marry (get legally/financially joined with another person) someone of the same sex. I like the outcome, just not the argument.

Okay, so that was really boring, and I’m sorry. So, there’s only one way to save some face after that… you got it, cue the dancing chicken…

Wow… that is a lot of air-brushing. And usually people are ‘touched up’ for print ads and billboards where they might be in gigantic displays over high traffic areas, but holy crap, that, THAT, is A LOT of airbrushing. Do you know who that is? If not, guess how old she is. That is the 55-year-old wife of Senator/presidential nominee John McCain, Cindy McCain, in a pro-same sex marriage ad. From this story:

John McCain’s office issued a statement saying the Arizona senator respects the views of members of his family but remains opposed to gay marriage. It says McCain believes “marriage is only defined as between one man and one woman.”

Like John McCain can say anything; he’s almost a hundred years old, so banging a 55 year old is a great accomplishment and as a man he’ll let a hot piece of ass (relatively speaking) do whatever she wants as long as she’s giving it up. So, what we can take away from this is that John’s still hittin’ that! Yeah buddy!

But, this is what she actually looks like:

And so you remember, this is their chubby daughter who is best known for this picture she posted on her Twitter page:

New York – the state – has said a big F-U to gay people and didn’t make same-sex marriage legal, by 12 votes (which this story says is a big deal). Whatever, people are idiots and think this matters to anyone other than the people that want to marry someone of the same sex. And stop calling it Gay Marriage. That’s stupid. There are no laws that say a homosexual can’t get married; hell, two homosexual’s can actually marry one another… not that I should have to spell that out, but I’m talking about a gay man marrying a straight woman, or a gay man marrying a lesbian. Can two straight dudes marry each other; it wouldn’t be “Gay Marriage,” would it? People are stupid.

Something I actually care about talking about… I wonder if I married a lesbian if she’d let me watch her cheat on me. She’d better, I mean if she wants me buy her a new dishwasher or a mop or whatever else wives need to be wives. Ha, ha, sexist jokes are timeless. “You didn’t take the trash out, so I did it.” ‘What! You want a fuckin’ medal, make me a sandwich.’

No surprises, right? Maine says ‘F-you gay marriage…’ Gay rights advocates say ‘F-you Obama…’

• Gay activists were frustrated that Obama, who insists he staunchly supports their overall civil rights agenda, didn’t speak out forcefully in defense of Maine’s marriage law before Tuesday’s referendum. The law was repealed in a vote of 53 percent to 47 percent.

Hmm. Yeah, stupid. Still no surprises: Washington State says ‘everything but…’

• Washington state voters have approved the state’s new “everything but marriage” law, marking a significant expansion of rights for gay couples who are registered as domestic partners.

Everything but… I bought into that crap once. This chick said we can do everything but have actual sex. I said sure – I didn’t really have that much going on at the time - and it was bull shit. There we are, both naked, doing nasty things to each others junk, but not having “sex” because that would be going to far? And this went on for a while. Then, this one time, we got really wasted… and bam! Chick’s begging me to have sex, so I hit it of course. And then I dumped her ass the next day. Point? No point, just letting you know that the player has always been playin’. A chick that doesn’t hold to her convictions is no chick I want to be spending my time with…

Vermont is now letting same-sex couples make the worst decision of their lives. Take it from me, I’m a Domestic Partner… with my lady, sorry fellas. It’s a sweet deal. It’s a commitment, so it gets them off your back (insert gay joke here); and if you want to end it, all you have to do is go to the courthouse and say ‘I’m done” and then sign a piece of paper… then the Player can start playin’; or get wasted and settle for the fat-ugly chick I’ve been making eyes at all night just in case it had to come down to that.

Here’s a story of two guys who through it all, are still together, only now it’s going to cost a lot of money if they ever decide they don’t want to be together anymore; although, I used to watch Six Feet Under and the gay characters that were played by straight guys allowed their partners to sleep with whoever they wanted; so maybe that is the secret to true happiness in a marriage: be married, but bang whoever you want. Ah, don’t you just love when romance is in the air.

*And just a stupid side note – how I really feel - Any two people should be able to join in a legally binding contract. I could marry a 64-year-old retarded chick for her Medicare check, but I couldn’t marry my guy roommate if it made personal and financial sense… Bleh, whatever.