Political Sex

No surprises, right? Maine says ‘F-you gay marriage…’ Gay rights advocates say ‘F-you Obama…’

• Gay activists were frustrated that Obama, who insists he staunchly supports their overall civil rights agenda, didn’t speak out forcefully in defense of Maine’s marriage law before Tuesday’s referendum. The law was repealed in a vote of 53 percent to 47 percent.

Hmm. Yeah, stupid. Still no surprises: Washington State says ‘everything but…’

• Washington state voters have approved the state’s new “everything but marriage” law, marking a significant expansion of rights for gay couples who are registered as domestic partners.

Everything but… I bought into that crap once. This chick said we can do everything but have actual sex. I said sure – I didn’t really have that much going on at the time - and it was bull shit. There we are, both naked, doing nasty things to each others junk, but not having “sex” because that would be going to far? And this went on for a while. Then, this one time, we got really wasted… and bam! Chick’s begging me to have sex, so I hit it of course. And then I dumped her ass the next day. Point? No point, just letting you know that the player has always been playin’. A chick that doesn’t hold to her convictions is no chick I want to be spending my time with…

Vermont is now letting same-sex couples make the worst decision of their lives. Take it from me, I’m a Domestic Partner… with my lady, sorry fellas. It’s a sweet deal. It’s a commitment, so it gets them off your back (insert gay joke here); and if you want to end it, all you have to do is go to the courthouse and say ‘I’m done” and then sign a piece of paper… then the Player can start playin’; or get wasted and settle for the fat-ugly chick I’ve been making eyes at all night just in case it had to come down to that.

Here’s a story of two guys who through it all, are still together, only now it’s going to cost a lot of money if they ever decide they don’t want to be together anymore; although, I used to watch Six Feet Under and the gay characters that were played by straight guys allowed their partners to sleep with whoever they wanted; so maybe that is the secret to true happiness in a marriage: be married, but bang whoever you want. Ah, don’t you just love when romance is in the air.

*And just a stupid side note – how I really feel - Any two people should be able to join in a legally binding contract. I could marry a 64-year-old retarded chick for her Medicare check, but I couldn’t marry my guy roommate if it made personal and financial sense… Bleh, whatever.