Political Sex

Oh, that media… Obama is on vacation in Hawaii and after working out in the morning, then playing some basketball, he took his thin children to enjoy some shaved ice and flavored syrup. Ah-Ha! the idiots say. The President of the United States’ wife Mrs. Fat-kids-are-killing-America Michelle Obama’s husband (The President of the United States) and children (The President of the United States’ kids) are eating unhealthy. What a hippo-crite (see what I did there).

Whatever, don’t take any guff Mrs. Obama. The only thing I’m more repulsed by than fat kids is a lot of them, and this country is silly with fat kids. And the only thing that makes them bearable is watching how frustrated they get when they’re hungry. So, rock on Mrs. First Lady – let’s make those little porkers squirm.

People are also - supposedly – pissed off that the Obamas are in Hawaii while some Americans who choose to live in miserable places have to deal with the same weather conditions they have to every year.

Update: I moved the video after the jump because it kept starting automatically and that’s just annoying. So, now this post has really lost it’s effect. Oh well, it wasn’t that good anyway.

Just kidding… hahahaha. Boy-oh-boy I sure do love a good prank; in case you don’t realize what just happened to you – IN YO’ FACE - I put ‘the Obamas dancing like strippers…’ in the title, but it was just a video of them dancing with a bunch of kids from another country… maybe India, I think he’s there right now? It doesn’t really matter.

No hard feelings about the prank though, right. Good. It’s nice to know we can play around like that… (sigh) good times, good times.

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I don’t care, at all, about who wears what… but all I read out all day was how god damn great Michelle Obama looked in her fancy dress. Because that’s really important (And really all I mean by ’read all day’ was I saw it once from somewhere I don’t remember, and I could have easily made it up). But look at her right shoulder/arm/breast area; I didn’t think skin flapping over the top of clothing was IN. And the only reason this should matter to anyone at all, is that women look up to her, and I don’t like the precedent this sets.  Pretty soon all chicks are going to be wearing stuff that’s so tight it makes their skin fold over… that’s just gross, don’t do it.

People are idiots, with no sense of humor, and have giant sticks up their big stupid asses. From this story:

They were just a couple of flirty one-liners delivered to a handsome fellow in a Buffalo-area restaurant. But because the “hottie” was President Barack Obama, the local and national media were on Luann Haley like hot sauce on a chicken wing.

Jay Leno got into the act and fired off a joke about her. Someone dubbed her the “Buffalo cougar.” Twitterers passed the story around, and people began leaping to the conclusion that Haley was a publicity hound, a jerk, a loose woman, a “classless tramp” or all of the above.

She was just kidding around; it’s what human beings do; less-than-human beings get offended by stuff like this… Like I have a standing invitation to First Lady Michelle Obama for some sweet-tender loving, and unlike Luann Haley, I’d be fine with being a home-wrecker – but does this make me a publicity-hungry-loose-classless-jerk-tramp? No, because I’m joking. Unless Mrs. Obama is looking for something she may not be getting at home because her husband is the busiest man in the country who may not have time to fulfill his husbandly duties… and because I’m a lazy-underachiever with plenty of time for my women. And again, I’m just joking. Like when I say, if she wanted to get a hold of me she could just click on the ‘About’ page at the top of the site and shoot me an email. And how I’m really good at keeping a secret… hahaha, I’m so funny. Seriously though, Michelle, I’d treat you right.

I hate PETA so much… It’s not that I don’t like animals. They’re fine, I guess. Whatever. The cat that lives with us can be entertaining. I eat a lot of animals, PETA wouldn’t like that. But I don’t even hate PETA because they tell me what to do; a lot of people tell me what to do. I just hate them because they’re a bunch of losers who prey on all the other losers in the world who need a cause to complain about, and picked animals because all the other losers who picked animals seem so happy that they like animals more than everyone else.

It’s not the cause, it’s the douche bag way they go about it… they’ve taken the Most Annoying Cause People award away from the pot-hawking-clipboard schmucks. As an example they just assumed that because they have never seen First Lady Michelle Obama wear fur, they can use her picture in their ads. Who cares? I shouldn’t, it’s not my picture; I just hate them so much.