I’ve never been prouder to be human. Presidential hopeful Herman Cain ran/runs (it doesn’t matter) a pizza company called Godfather Pizza. I’ve never heard of it before this Cain guy came about, but it seems that a while ago he did a big production covering John Lennon’s Imagine with the lyrics being about pizza. I’m assuming he did this to promote his pizza company, but I really hope he just did this because he really like pizza; either way, this makes me happy.
This guy Chris Christie is the Governor of New Jersey and has continually told his national supporters that he will not be running for President in 2012. And when I say continually I mean ever time he was in front of a microphone for the last year – the last time being last Tuesday during a speech at the Reagan Library; but now he’s seriously contemplating it, from this story:
The renewed consideration about a White House run came after prodding this week from some Republicans he idolizes, including former First Lady Nancy Reagan, former Secretary of State Henry Kissinger, and former President George W. Bush, sources said.
So, a group of popular kids have convinced the fat, geeky kid that he should run for Senior Class President, telling him he could win because of he would get all the geeks who don’t want the cool jock – who everyone thinks is a shoo-in – to win.
*Easy racist hunters, I didn’t allude to Barack Obama being a jock because he’s black, with the stereotype about black people and sports; it’s a decent analogy, and Obama plays basketball. So, leave me alone, dicks.
President Barack Obama is in the Bay Area to do get a bunch of rich liberals to give him money. Well, not give, they got to have dinner with him for $35,800. That’s a stupid amount of money, and I don’t mean “stupid” like expensive, I mean it’s kind of random. Why not round that down to an even $35,000, or up to $40,000? I bet some douche-bag campaign adviser put a lot thought into this; we’d like to get $35,000, but I bet we could get more, but probably not $36,000, hmm, how about $35,500? - to which Obama hopefully said, “I don’t give a shit, they’ll pay whatever we ask… Let’s do $35,800, so it seems like there’s a reason.
One of those rich people was Lady Gaga. And apparently there’s a Q&A portion of the dinner, which if you don’t know means Question and Answer. The only reason I say that is because I’m not sure Lady Gaga knows, from this story:
According to a source present in the tent fundraiser, Gaga asked a question during the Q&A. She first thanked the president for what he’s accomplished, then read from what she said was a letter from a fan about the suicide of another fan who had been subjected to bullying.
She thanked Obama for hosting his anti-bullying conference with Michelle Obama, and then made a general plea to everyone in the room, including the president, to do what they can to prevent bullying.
Obama – And what’s your question, Miss Gaga? Did anyone get a question? Uh, do you just want me to talk about bullying? Okay, I guess I can do that.
Obama thanked her, spoke about his administration’s anti-bullying campaign, and then more generally about the importance of values and who we are as Americans.
This all sounds like a really good use of a President’s time.
Why do political ads have to look like movie trailers? Michael Bay and the producers of ‘Armageddon’ could probably sue over this new Rick Perry ad, or at least get royalties; I was actually disappointed that it didn’t have Ben Affleck standing up slowly with sweat dripping from his chin while the camera spins around him.
Let’s break it down:
0:00 - That’s the back of the Original Los Angeles Flower Market, which is part of LA’s Flower District and it seems to be doing pretty good, complete with solar panels. So, what’s the message with this image; Obama’s the reason put a plastic bag on a parking meter? Litter!!!!
0:13 – Empty greeting card aisle? It’s so bad, no one is saying “Thank you.”
0:20 – Start of fairly effective “President Zero/Jobs” montage. The whole ad could have been this 25 seconds, but then what would they do with all that ‘This is America’ footage.
0:45 – Horse legs running in water… okay.
0:50 – Kid with American flag cape, which if that were happening in real life the kid’s 65-year-old neighbor would be chasing the little thief.
0:59 – Cows.
1:08 – Awesome high-five in time with the music beat.
1:14 – What the hell is going on there?
1:19 – Kid with toy plane while fighter jets fly overhead. Michael Bay peed a little when he saw this (probably happened).
1:28 – “I sold Rick Perry a hot dog and got to be in a video; today’s a good day, a good day indeed.”
1:32 – Okay, Rick, this is where you’re going to stand in a field and look off into the distance. Hmm, actually look towards the sun, ah, yes, there’s the squint we were looking for.
I know what you’re thinking, you really want to see Bruce Willis save the world right now.
President Barack Obama provided some pre-football kickoff entertainment last night with a really good speech; he did some thumb pointing, people in the audience expressed their opinions by either clapping or not clapping, and now we’re getting some behind the scenes action with the head of Congress telling the president of the Senate – who are supposed to hate each other – that he had a good golf game the other day. Goooooo Politics!
I love the bro-hug they give each other at the beginning of the clip. It’s like when pro baseball players from rival teams are seen together sharing a hooker. The only people who actually believe there’s a rivalry are the fans.
Obama’s speech? Hmm… if you need something to contribute if you end up in some douchey conversation about politics over the weekend, just talk about Obama’s tie color. It’ll confuse people because it will sound like it means something. I couldn’t believe he was wearing the blue tie, if a President really means business, like when we go to war, he wears a red tie. Blue means he’s still trying to bring everyone together. And if some chick gets all pissed that you always refer the President as a “he” and reminds you that a woman could be President, just pat her on the head and say, “That’s adorable… What? I kid, I kid” while looking at all the guys shaking your head and winking. Then pound your drink and excuse yourself to get another. Done and done!
