Political Sex

This is the guy that allegedly parked a remedial bomb in New York City. And there’s probably a very interesting story behind this, but I haven’t read it, I just can’t get passed his eyebrows. Look at that uni-brow… God Damn that thing is fantastic. Usually prominent eyebrows on a man grow from the bridge of the nose out to their temples, and because the two eyebrows are so close together the straggler hairs make it look like one eyebrow. But this guy’s eyebrows don’t even cover the span of his eyes and yet the straggler hairs have traveled great distances, and survived great trials to be together – a love story if you will. If it didn’t look ridiculous and if I never wanted to have sex again, I would totally let the brows become one.

Is this why he wanted to blow us up? Was he tired of all the metrosexual men plucking their eyebrows and denying a love that is pure? Take that New York and your male grooming – notice how I didn’t use the term ‘manscaping’ because if I did I would have to punch myself in the balls, and I would probably chicken out at the last moment… and then what; I’d just be a guy who can’t even punish himself for being a douche. That’s no way to live your life.

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